Chapter 6 – The Photoshoot

Shortly before 2 p.m., Chloe got off the bus near the converted warehouse where the photo studio was located. She was wearing her short shorts and a crop top, practical in this weather, and she could change at the studio, after all.

The gym bag over her shoulder also contained two dresses, the red one and the black one, a few lingerie sets, and some other clothes, everything she might need for the shoot.

She found the right number on the second floor and pressed the doorbell.

“Yes?” The voice on the intercom sounded a little out of breath.

“Hi, I’m Chloe. I have an appointment with Julian?”

A buzz. The door clicked open.

At the top of the stairs, a young guy, maybe in his early twenties, was waiting, wearing large glasses and an oversized hoodie, which made Chloe feel a twinge of envy. She liked oversized hoodies, but that wasn’t necessarily the right style for Chloe Heart.

“Hi, Chloe!” He pushed up his glasses. “Come on in, Julian is just getting his equipment ready.”

He led her inside, and fortunately, the studio wasn’t somehow shady, as she had feared, but surprisingly normal. White-painted walls, softbox lights on tripods, a backdrop screen, and even the smell of freshly brewed coffee.

Julian himself looked remarkably unkempt, like someone who had given up trying years ago but was perfectly content with that. Mid-forties, maybe, with a lazy three-day stubble. He barely looked up from his camera.

“Hi, I’m Julian. We’ll get started in a minute, I just have to finish this thing here.” He muttered more to himself than to her as he fiddled with the camera settings. “Sit down somewhere. Moe made coffee, I think. I’ll be ready in a minute.”

Chloe stood there, the Chloe Heart smile plastered on her face. “Sure, no problem!”

She sat down on a chair at the edge of the room and took out her phone to make a quick selfie in the studio she could upload on Instapic later. First professional photoshoot for my portfolio!💕 would be the caption.

Julian and his assistant discussed settings, light meter readings, technical stuff she didn’t understand and didn’t need to understand. She waited and tried to maintain the eager-to-please energy that defined Chloe Heart.

“Okay, come here. Chloe Hard, or whatever.”

She stood up. “Chloe Heart,” she said with a beaming smile.

Julian grinned crookedly. “Sure, Chloe Heart.” The tone was mocking, as if he could only take it half seriously. He pointed to a marked area. “Stand there.”

She let the bag drop on the floor and moved into position.

“Shouldn’t I… you know, change or something?”

“Nah, the first set is casual. You look good just the way you are.”

He raised the camera and looked through the viewfinder. “Smile. Now more serious. Left arm up. Back straight. Turn your head.”

Chloe followed every instruction, letting him move her like a puppet and trying to balance her facial expressions and gaze on the fine line between innocent and seductive, where she wanted to position Chloe Heart.

Click, click, click.

It was difficult at first. She was too much in her head, overanalyzing every pose. At least, that’s what she thought.

“You’re really easy to direct.” Julian lowered the camera and looked at the display. “You know, it’s rare for one of Ziegler’s girls to get it so quickly.”

“What do you mean?”

“Most, um… newcomers keep doing the same bullshit poses, and it’s so hard to get them to forget that.” He scrolled through the pictures. “You actually have the right instincts for this.”

“Oh… I mean, thank you!” She put honey in her voice. She had to be perfect, even in the small interactions. This was a big deal for Chloe Heart, so Chloe Heart had to give her best.

“Wow, that smile you’re doing, keep that. Perfect.”

Spurred on by his praise, she even winked playfully, giving it her all to present Chloe Heart as flirty and ready for anything.

Julian nodded. “Yes, just like that, gorgeous.”

The minutes passed, the awkwardness subsided, and she even began to enjoy the camera a bit, or at least it got increasingly easy to pretend to enjoy the camera. Every click of the camera felt like an affirmation and Julian praised her more and more, not effusively, but with genuine appreciation.

The lights were bright and the air was quite stuffy, but somehow she was suddenly fully in the moment, fully in her role.

“Let’s do a few outfit changes now. What did you bring?”

Chloe pointed uncertainly at her sports bag. “I have dresses, some tops and shorts, lingerie… that kind of stuff.”

“Don’t worry, Chloe.” Julian grinned. “I’m sure you’ll look good in anything. We’ll make it work.”

She pulled out her options. He nodded at the red dress. “Let’s try that. Get changed, I’ll adjust the lighting.”

The assistant brought her water, and only then did she realize how thirsty she was. She gulped half the bottle down.

The “changing room” was basically just a corner separated by sheets. Not much privacy, but it was functional enough. She changed quickly, the red dress sliding over her hips and hugging her body. She freshened up her makeup and studied herself in the small mirror leaning against the wall.

Okay, yes, Chloe Heart looks pretty hot.

She took a deep breath and returned.

“Let’s get started. Keep smiling, okay? Your smile is phenomenal.”

It was much easier now. She had more confidence, she knew what he wanted. The dress accentuated her figure perfectly and the poses he had her strike highlighted her assets.

“It would be better if you didn’t wear a bra under this dress,” Julian said casually. “The straps are visible from some angles.”

She hesitated for a heartbeat, then reached behind her and unhooked it. The bra disappeared under the dress, and she pulled it out as if it were the most natural thing in the world. She set it aside and they continued.

At his request, she switched between different facial expressions: shy and confident, teasing and innocent. She really got into the flow.

“Perfect. Of course. Just be yourself.”

Who am I anyway? But she smiled and carried on.

“Time for lingerie.”

She changed into the black lingerie set. When she came back, the lights were dimmed. Julian’s tone was calmer now as well, his instructions a little gentler.

“We can do this relaxed, Chloe, we’re not in a hurry.”

She continued posing and the flow continued as well. To her surprise, she realized that she was actually enjoying herself now, even the real part of her. A little discomfort was still there, but that was manageable. She could do this. But of course, the hardest part was yet to come.

“Okay, the last set is full nude. Are you okay with that?”

Chloe’s throat tightened, but she nodded.

She undressed behind the sheets, and the nervousness came back with full force. Her hands trembled a little as she took off the lacy thong.

That’s it. No turning back.

She stepped naked in front of the camera. Vulnerable. Exposed.

The lights shone on her skin, making her aware of every hair, every bump. Her heart pounded so hard she could feel it in her throat. The air conditioning blew cold air over her naked skin and her nipples stiffened, even though it was warm under the lights.

You’re not Chloe Thompson. You’re Chloe Heart. Chloe Heart thinks this is no big deal. Chloe Heart is proud of her body and happy to show it off.

She forced her shoulders back and lifted her chin. Her arms instinctively twitched, wanted to cover her body, but she kept them at her sides. The camera stared at her like a giant black eye, and behind it was Julian, and behind him would be who knows how many people who would see these pictures. Definitely Ben Ziegler and some producers.

Julian, however, made no suggestive comments or anything, but just continued to take pictures with the same calm professionalism as before.

“Chin up slightly. Good. Turn to the side and bend your arm a little. Can you sit down? Now look up and let your hair fall back. Perfect! Can you spread your legs a little wider, please, there’s a shadow.”

Completely relaxed and respectful.

With each instruction, it became a little easier. She concentrated on the technical aspects – where the light fell, how she had to tense her muscles to get the right posture. It was almost like yoga, only without clothes and with a stranger documenting everything.

When he asked her to sit down and spread her legs, she felt the heat rush to her cheeks. But she did it, as with all the other poses, as if it were completely natural, as if she were a doll that he was positioning with his instructions.

This isn’t real. This isn’t me. It’s just a body doing what needs to be done.

Chloe felt… okay. Not comfortable but not violated either. He was just doing his job, treating her no differently than when she was still wearing clothes. That gave her more confidence than she expected.

“Done.” Julian lowered the camera. “Good job.”

The almost casual acknowledgment put weight into his words.

“Especially for the first time. You have real talent.”

Chloe quickly grabbed the robe the assistant handed her and pulled it on.

“Thank you! I hope the photos show that.”

Julian nodded and reached for his coffee. “They will definitely. You move well in front of the camera.” A sip. “And you’re uncomplicated. I like that.”

Uncomplicated? Chloe was briefly perplexed. She was anything but uncomplicated, at least not in her head. Who did Julian see? Herself or Chloe Heart?

But she just nodded and smiled. “Thanks, Julian. You made it easy for me.”

When he saw her smile, he raised the camera again and took a few snapshots of her in her bathrobe, just sitting there.

“I’ll send the pictures to Ben right away. He’ll be happy.” Julian held out his hand to her. “Hope we can work together again, Chloe. You’re cool.”

His grip was firm, sincere.

“Totally.” Chloe smiled Chloe Hearts’ smile, but with a spark of genuine joy in it.

She gathered her things, said goodbye to the assistant, and left the studio.

She had done it. The portfolio was in the bag.

~

The bus ride back felt endless. It was stuffy and hot and very crowded with afternoon commuters. Her gym bag lay heavy on her lap, filled with the clothes she had just worn in front of Julian’s camera. Or hadn’t worn.

It smelled of sweat. The man sitting in front of her was dozing with his mouth open, a thin thread of saliva glistening on his chin. When she finally reached her stop, she was relieved.

The stairs to her apartment felt like a marathon. Her legs were heavy from hours of standing and posing, but the emotional exhaustion of having to be Chloe Heart for hours on end also weighed on her.

The door closed behind her, then she dropped her bag, took off her clothes, and went straight into the shower.

The water came in irregular bursts again, first cold, then lukewarm, then finally warm enough that she dared to get under it. She rinsed off her makeup, scrubbed her hair with the cheap shampoo she had bought, and tried to find her center again.

Her own thoughts from earlier echoed in her head.

This isn’t real. This isn’t me. It’s just a body doing what needs to be done.

Was that really the case? Was Chloe Heart just a mask she could put on and take off?

Her plan, her mission, was progressing well, but the feeling that was brewing in her stomach was strange. It was not nausea, not pride, but something in between.

The ringing of her cell phone snapped her out of her thoughts. She turned off the water and grabbed the thin towel. Dripping wet, wrapped only in the towel, she hurried into the room.

Ben Ziegler.

Her heart skipped a beat. She grabbed her phone and quickly switched into Chloe Heart mode.

“Hi Ben!”

“Listen, the shoot went well.” His voice sounded satisfied, almost surprised. “Julian already sent me a few pictures.”

A pause. Then: “Fucking A.”

Chloe almost laughed. Julian really must have sent the photos right after she left.

“Oh really? Yay! I hope it was what you expected.”

Ben chuckled. “Expected? Girl, I never have expectations. But you impressed me, I give you that.”

Another pause. She could hear him breathing.

“I think we should make it official.”

“Official?” The nervous anticipation in her voice was real.

“Yeah, I’m signing you as talent. From now on, I’ll act as your agent.” He sounded like he was doing her a huge favor. “You do what I say, I’ll make sure you make it big. Does that sound good?”

Chloe didn’t have to fake her excitement. She really felt it, albeit for different reasons than Ben thought. Samantha’s old agent. I’m in.

“Oh my God, that’s incredible! Thank you so much!”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s fine. Keep it up and you’ll have a real chance.” He cleared his throat. “I’ll start shopping you around. I’m sure I can get you booked for CCC within a week or two. Come by the office sometime this week to take care of the paperwork.”

“I promise I’ll do my best!”

“Good. I’ll be in touch.”

He hung up without saying goodbye.

She took a deep breath and collapsed onto the bed. The mattress groaned dangerously under her weight. She closed her eyes and felt the tension leave her shoulders.

I did it.

She clenched her fist and thrust it into the air. “Yes, yes, yes!” she hissed through clenched teeth. Adrenaline pulsed through her veins.

She was officially part of Ben’s roster. She now had access to people who knew Samantha. And she had the chance to investigate Ben himself, because she couldn’t rule out that he had something to do with the murder.

It worked. My crazy plan actually worked!

She lay there, staring at the ceiling of her run-down apartment in a strange city. And she smiled. A real smile, not a Chloe Heart smile.

She got up and put on comfortable clothes, like the oversized hoodie that Chloe Heart could never wear. It was soft and still smelled like home… no, it still smelled like Oak Springs, because home was now this dump.

She decided to take the afternoon off.

I’ve earned it. Just one afternoon.

She rummaged around in her small kitchenette, found the eggs she had bought two days ago and the bread that was slowly getting stale, and made herself scrambled eggs with toast.

Shortly afterwards, she balanced a full plate back to the bed, opened her laptop and went to Webflix, where she was almost overwhelmed by the selection.

Heavy political thrillers, series about depressed Scandinavian detectives and lots of true crime documentaries. No. There had been enough true crime in her life and she also didn’t want anything depressing or anything that required thinking.

She scrolled further and landed on a sitcom from the 90s. Just Us Girls. It was about a single mother, Sadie, who leaves her abusive husband and together with her three young daughters she moves in with her eccentric lesbian sister Cassie. Harmless, charming, and not too exciting, it was just right.

The intro song, “Hold On” by Wilson Philipps, started playing – “Don’t you know? Don’t you know, things can change? Things’ll go your way!” – and Chloe shoveled the first few forkfuls of scrambled eggs into her mouth like a paddle steamer.

On the screen, Sadie was trying to get her daughters, who were running wild again, ready for school, while Cassie sat at the breakfast table with a hangover and a pained expression, holding her aching head.

Chloe actually smiled from time to time. Not the practiced smile, but a genuine, rare, little grin.

For one afternoon, she could just… do nothing, just be there. She wasn’t the sister on a revenge mission, nor the wannabe porn star, but simply a tired eighteen-year-old lounging on the bed, watching some undemanding series and shoveling scrambled eggs into her mouth. She felt almost… normal.

Sadie and Cassie were arguing about Cassie bringing a date home when her phone rang.

Ben Ziegler. What? Again? Slightly alarmed, she paused the episode  and reached for the phone.

“Hello?”

“Hey, I just got off the phone with Randy Miles.” Ben’s voice sounded unusually excited and smug, almost like a used car salesman who had just pulled one over on someone.

“Oh?” Chloe pulled her legs under her, the plate with the leftover scrambled eggs balanced on her knees.

“Yeah, I showed him your portfolio shots. He’s crazy for you. He really wants you for CCC.”

“Oh! That’s… that’s great, I guess?” The words came out automatically while her brain was still trying to process Ben’s sudden change in tone.

She could practically hear Ben’s smarmy grin through the phone. “Yeah. So, he wants you tomorrow. 2 p.m.”

There was silence.

“Tomorrow?”